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Polyamory = “many loves,” not “many loves who necessarily must be permitted to hook up with each other.” Enact whatever rules work for your family, but don’t play the “my way of doing poly is the best” game. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but I think the fact that the sex in the show is almost exclusively threesomes and foursomes and moresomes–and those who are seen having one-on-one sex are cast members who also frequently are shown participating in group sex–seems to fuel the misconception that this is what all poly folks are doing. But I would say that it’s equally common, if not more common, to be in relationships of the V (or N or W or some kind of zig-zagging line) variety, in which people have multiple partners but the sex still happens only between two individuals at a time.
I know Showtime is trying to sensationalize the group sex here, but it would have been nice for the sake of balance if the show had included a poly relationship that didn’t include threesomes or foursomes, since that’s the reality for a lot of us. There’s a lot of attention given to sex in general.
Rather than only focusing on the drama within the relationships (of which there admittedly was plenty), the show also tackled obstacles that are facing poly people living in a monogamous world.The two groups on the show, however, are a triad and a quad, both groups living and planning futures together.Members of both families had lovers outside of their live-in partners, but the focus was definitely more on the dynamics of the partners living together under the same roof.I will say that the coming out scenes felt a little unrealistically smooth to me, though; I was applauding all the warm fuzzy parental approval while at the same time thinking that even my super awesome and accepting and open-minded parents would probably be a bit hesitant if I told them I was actually going to marry my other partner.Bisexuality in poly is directly addressed when one member of the triad says that as a bisexual woman, monogamy would inherently close off part of her sexuality.